Tags: poetry

dancer, belly dance, joy

Catching Fire (a trip & hubs update)

We are back from Vegas. We've been back since Friday night around 9:30. I've been too pooped out. So has hubs. He finally admitted defeat with this stroke thing hanging over his every move. The trip kicked his ass. And mine, but I've been dealing with health issues longer than he has, so I kinda know my limits and how to plan, etc. It's hard to see him grappling with the fact he isn't able to just jump up and go back to life as he's always known it. He continues to have double vision, and now more than 3 weeks post-stroke, it looks like it might be the thing that lingers for him. He has never been good with dates and numbers, but he's worse now. He had a hearing this morning--he kept mixing up dates, etc. when we were running through the case yesterday, so much so, that I dressed for court too, and was his paralegal this morning. Fortunately, both parties agreed to continue because hubs doesn't have a full set of discovery (all the police documents and text transcripts that the other side possesses, but hubs doesn't yet have).

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cookie, christmas, derpy, gingerbread boy

Eyes on Fire

the flame burns hot

and reddens all I see

for I am not

where I should be

the passions burn

and I must write

but the fires, I've learned

are filled with might

so, with charred feathers

and bloodshot eyes

storms must be weathered

so I can rise

My eyes are doing slightly better, which is a really good thing because I'm working at the law office later this week. It'll be nice to replenish some of the extra money I spent on Christmas gifts. The eyeballs are still hating on me quite a bit, and I don't work until Wednesday, so I am still trying to baby them and figure out the right balance for wearing the goggles to preserve my eyes but taking the goggles off in time to prevent a migraine (I do NOT have that balance figured out yet).

I'll be going in to get my hair done soon. I have a gift certificate for a fancy salon, but I don't know if they'll be equipped to do my crazy colors or if they are more conservative, so I need to give them a call. If they don't do crazy colors, I'm considering a facial. I have that lovely butterfly rash on my face (though it is not as pronounced as other lupies I know) and I'd like to see if there is a way to clear that up without medication.

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cookie, christmas, derpy, gingerbread boy


I wrote this when I was a teenager, just discovering that there was more than one race because my family was so very mixed. See, I identify as Cuban, but I present as white for the most part and had a Blackfoot great-grandmother who was forcibly removed from her family back in the day. This might give you some insight as to how I'm handling everything that is transpiring in our nation right now...I'm sad. Very sad. This poem is circa 1987 or 88 in case anyone cares. I was about 18 years old. Still sums up where I am right now.


Chocolate, vanilla, strawberry

under one sky

living in harmony 

it's all so Neapolitan

Chocolate girl hugs vanilla guy

Strawberry kiss

melts the sky

it's Neapolitan

Strawberry guy

meets vanilla girl

they have a baby

a strawberry swirl

I scream

the melting pot

will grant us free


Everyone's different

each individual

but extraordinary

when put together

Chocolate, vanilla, strawberry

share their flavors

around the globe

in Neapolitan harmony

It's Neapolitan

our world today

did it occur to you

it should be this way?

cookie, christmas, derpy, gingerbread boy

Love Letters

Found poetry from Peoria Magazine: https://www.peoriamagazines.com/pm/2020/aug/love-letters-peoria

Artwork by Morgan "Madhatter" Mullen--the focus of the article. ♥
Artwork by Morgan "Madhatter" Mullen--the focus of the article. ♥

anger into positive

masks with six versions

muses of comedy, tragedy

tears reveal sadness

frustrated by negativity

channel anger into positive

amidst chaos--helping others

love letters people can wear

protected and supported 

by the community

I think the collective negativity in my country is contributing to my individual negativity. I'm ashamed by how negatively I reacted yesterday to hubs's loss of drone and phone (which actually occurred on Tuesday) and I know he feels horrible about losing both. I think I'm more angry with myself than with him right now--I let myself get suckered into the drone business. That isn't completely his fault because I did not stick to my guns at the onset. 

Anyway, my eyeballs still hate me. The United States is still in flames. COVID is still killing people. It's time to take personal stock and see how I can help improve the situation. I am not interested in fanning the flames, and I think that's what I did yesterday...I am very sorry I vented here, but I appreciate this format in which I can safely vent. Maybe I needed to vent because I did stuff down that angst for a number of years. I think I should have focused my anger more like Ms. Mullen did with her art though. Art therapy can be a great healer. Hence, the inspiration behind my found poem.

Peace, love & butterflies. Be well, stay safe. ♥

cookie, christmas, derpy, gingerbread boy

First Day on the LJ

Thank you to one_raido for her post about our birthings on LiveJournal. I was here a millionty and one years ago and at the time, it was because I was very into metaphor and poetry (I still am, but to a lesser extent). I came here because of themonklaughs (on her old account, but she currently posts now and again on the one I tagged). She, another friend and I started an open mic geared toward poets, writers and musicians for teens and older in Peoria, Illinois back then called Aesthetic Underground. There is now an awesome and amazing spoken word open mic when health guidelines permit at The Contemporary Art Center on Peoria's beautiful riverfront called Whisper & Shout.

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Dog Days of Summer

Fulton County Reserve--one of their many lakes. We are considering renting a lot with electric as a weekend getaway, right in this very area.
Fulton County Reserve--one of their many lakes. We are considering renting a lot with electric as a weekend getaway, right in this very area.

turtles lined up on a log

sunning themselves in obscurity

the peaceful forest sings lullabies

the frogs join in the chorus

to create a peace unmatched

the fish aren't biting

but it's all good

our bellies are full

our minds are content

there's abundant life all around

singing to the beat of the universe

our universe

where we are all one

and in harmony with

the sun overhead

the water below

and the rhythm of our hearts beating in unison


Still flaring, but I did do some social things over the weekend. We attended the drum circle on Friday--not as powerful as some others I've been to, but I've missed that vibe. Hotter than Hades and we all wore masks, which did detract a tiny bit from the experience. Hubs wasn't so into it...he didn't like the repetitive quality. I tried to explain to him that trance and unity and becoming one sound as a community was one of goals and benefits of a drum circle, but sadly, even though I brought a hand drum for him, he was still bored. We left after our friend did his magic show (naturally, he knew me, so I ended up as one of his audience "helpers" but he is a friend, so despite some stage fright, I was happy to oblige) and we met Gambit and another magic friend, JP (who was also there to support Gambit), afterward for some adult beverages. Which knocked me on my ass. lol White Russians seem like friendly, harmless, totally delicious, little milkshakes, but their hearts remain as icy as the Cold War. (Recipe for this delicious drink) Glad hubs was driving!

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soft fur and kangaroo kisses

sanctuary for the furbound

while the rest of the world is hellbound

and it all makes perfect sense

soft skin and flowery prose

sunflowers paint themselves

in murals for the mind

sunkissed and somnolent

the slumbering forest sighs

as it dreams 

of better tomorrows

...I'll have a better post later. I'm exhausted. Been out there. Living life. Wearing a mask, but among the masses. Went on a little road trip. We took my 80-year-old brother-in-law with us to places on his bucket list.


Too Many Thinks

Spending too much time down this month...either with the back, or just being sick. It was actually fever brain that got me on this thought path: I have very few regrets in life, but the regrets I have are big ones. Most regrets, I can't do anything about, so I try to not devote much time to them. But one recurring regret is dropping out of college to marry my first husband and never returning to complete my degree. (Before college, I graduated from travel school and got my certificate in travel & tourism. When I began college, I was studying to become an international flight attendant and I wanted to be fluent in several languages.) I made a couple of attempts to return as an adult, but I had to work full time, and since I'm certain I've had autoimmune since I was in high school, packing my schedule that tightly, while raising my daughter, did not work out well for me. I dropped more courses than I actually completed, so my pristine GPA is tarnished now.

Anyway, now that I am not working, I'm thinking about taking online courses. Maybe through the local colleges, but I likely can't afford an undergraduate degree from our local, private university, so I need to keep looking. When I was a foreign language major, my concentration was German & French. I'm barely conversational in those languages nowadays, though I bet it would come back to me quickly if I applied myself. I also still crave a fine arts degree in creative writing or art. 

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Back to Black

Almost picked Back In Black by AC/DC, but I actually like Amy's song better. And, it's another double entendre. My back is O-U-T, big time out. I'm quite miserable. No walking, dancing or anything remotely physical at the moment. I have cleaning out my fridge over the weekend to thank for this. Buh. In all fairness, the refrigerator was way overdue for a good scrub down, but not worth it if it's going to kill me softly.

I did manage to write a letter to a pen pal and got it out in the mail today. We dined inside of a restaurant for the first time in four months Friday night. Our friends were in town from Ohio (he's originally from Peoria and was in a rock band with hubs back in the day). We all wore masks in (obviously we took them off to eat), but I was shocked how many people came in without masks. It's not like the entire planet is in the middle of a highly contagious pandemic, or something...

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Serenity - In Progress

I'm such a nerd because I love double entendres. I am in the process of discovering serenity, but I am also in the process of learning choreography to the Godsmack song. It just happens to be my favorite Godsmack song, so this has been a ton of fun so far!

I was fortunate to catch Godsmack live in 2006 before they headlined their own shows. They opened for Metallica, and I honestly have to say that I enjoyed Godsmack more that day. Metallica looked tired and like they were barely tolerating each other, and that was *after* Jason Newsted left the band, so they should have been fresh.

I have a lot to do this month. I decided to make a Vision Board and display it over my treadmill. I'd like to nail down choreo for Serenity and jump back into the Shimmy Mob choreo (which I don't know by heart yet). I'd like to be performance-ready for both of those by month's end.

I have many, many miles to walk this month as well. And a set of cross-stitch Christmas ornaments to finish.

I'm doing a 30-day yoga thing to hopefully alleviate some stiffness, as well. I'm using it as a cool down from walking. I'm so much better with my yoga practice when I'm on a solid running or walking kick.

And, I might be sick of poetry by the end of the month. My biggest goal for July is to get my chap book completed and at least uploaded for self-publication. Pretty sure I'll be ready to write some fiction after that!

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